I’m writing this blog at this time of year at the risk of sounding cliche, but Thanksgiving this year really had me thinking about all I have to be grateful for in my life. This weekend’s message at church really solidified that. In my line of work, I frequently talk to people about how to overcome their negative thoughts, as these can easily lead to self-defeating behavior. One of the best ways to do this, as obvious as it may sound, is to get people to replace these negative thoughts with positive ones. Though it may be an obvious solution, it’s not always an easy one. Some ways to do this include disputing these thoughts by coming up with alternative explanations for the things that happened to bring the thoughts on in the first place, changing the negative thought into its direct opposite and trying to see things differently. Part of the last of these is changing your perception, which changes your reality.
One way to try to change your perception is to take a look at the good things in your life, also known as counting your blessings or creating an attitude of gratitude. I often suggest creating a gratitude journal in order to accomplish this. This journal is designed to serve as a place where a person can continually count his blessings, adding things to the list on a daily basis, and refer back to the list when he’s feeling down. This can take the form of a list of things about which a person is grateful, based on things that have happened during that day. Or it can take the form of prose, describing a person’s daily experiences and the thoughts that were triggered by them, the feelings of gratitude that were generated that day.
Examples of gratitude journal entries might include:
- People who have been a blessing in your life for one reason or another
- Places and things you enjoy
- Efforts you have made, i.e. being assertive with an unkind boss or setting a boundary with a friend or family member
- Your health and well-being, both physical and psychological
- Not giving up in a difficult situation
- Not doing something harmful to yourself, i.e. getting high, bingeing or cutting yourself
- Another day of doing something important, such as working out each morning before work or school
- Elements of nature
- Physical and intellectual abilities
- Your job, car or home
- Supportive friends, co-workers or family members
- A safe flight on your business trip
- Your health, senses or mobility
- Your freedom
- Daily life lessons
- A loving spouse
- Healthy children
- A safe return home from work or school
- The defense of our military
- Money to pay your bills or do fun things
- Friends who see you through the tough times
- Your customers, clients or patients
- Your talents, your gifts that you use to help or serve other people
- Your church
- God being in control so you don’t have to, knowing he has a plan even when things aren’t going well for you (that’s one of my favorites)
The bottom line is this: Whatever it is you are grateful for, remind yourself that you are grateful for it! The goal is to add to the journal each day as a reminder of all the blessings you have no matter what happens or happened in that day. Remember, how you think determines how you behave. For example, reminding yourself of your blessings in the midst of a bad day could keep you from sabotaging that evening by tapping into one of your vices. Just try it. You might be surprised at what you have.
